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My parents:

Paul & Julie Button are the two most selfless people in the entire world. I know, it’s what parents do; it’s giving up a part of themselves to satisfy their children’s wants and needs. But my parents do more. They’re my best friends, in all honestly.

Everyday I see more and more of myself in my mom. My mom and I enjoy the same things. We’re home-bodys and feel most comfortable around our small family in the solitude of our home. Simplicity is the type of taste she has instilled in me. My class and my kindness come from her. I often catch myself acting like my mom during my daily life. Whether it’s in the extreme amount of politeness I show towards others, that I tend to make everything a little more dramatic than it really is, or the fact that I become best friends with every cab driver I encounter- I know I am truly my mother’s daughter.

The same thing goes for my dad. My dad is the most loving person I have ever met in my entire life. The amount of compassion he has towards me, my mom, brother, and even our dog is extraordinary. My dad will do anything for anyone. Whether it’s driving 45 minutes out of the way to pickup one of my friends, or sit with me for countless hours on end helping me write my college application essays- he’s glad to do it. My dad and I share a special bond in our passions- journalism, writing, and anything related to television or news. My dad is the one person I constantly want to update with everything going on in my life. We have taken trips, just the two of us, and in those periods of time I have come to realize how much I sincerely appreciate and admire my father. He’s the perfect dad, husband, man, and human being all around.

My parents have set the bar high- and I will be spending the rest of my life trying to achieve the success, both spiritually and physically, that they have.

I love you, Mom & Dad.

Don’t get me wrong, I love college. But as time goes on, I’m starting to realize and wonder a lot of different things. There’s really no particular event or happening that triggered all of this. But, I feel more alone than ever. My friends are fun, but I feel like I’m stuck in a “high school” kind of lifestyle where drama outweighs everything else. I thought college was supposed to be a place for me to grow and experience new things. A place for me to find that group of people that I can have above-surface-level conversations with: people that I would want to remain friends with throughout the rest of my life.

I guess I just came here expecting too much. 

For now, I’ve kind of distanced myself from the people I was so close with my first few months with. Nothing is wrong, specifically. I just find myself wanting something deeper and more meaningful than what anyone here has had to offer me so far. Quote time:

“Normal is the halfway point between what you want and what you can get.” -Samantha Jones

“Some people are settling down, some people are settling and some people refuse to settle for anything less than butterflies.” -Carrie Bradshaw

“Have you ever had a moment, just you and your computer? Your cursor is hovering over a single button that could change every aspect of your life. It lingers, and it lingers. You’re wondering, ‘Do I go for it? Do I take a leap of faith?’ A single click that could forever change the way someone identifies you. The way the world categorizes who you are. You tap your fingers on your desk, and wonder, ‘since when did things become so easy?’ Hundreds of years ago, men had to fight for their name, to make something of themselves. It was a constant physical battle, to fight for what they wanted, for what they believed in. How have things changed so drastically, so soon? Today, with the click of a mouse you can change the world. You can make a name for yourself by a simple post or upload. Something that would hold your name forever—not in pencil, but in ink. Have you ever wondered, ‘What will people think of me 10, 20, even 50 years from now?’ There are the big shots: the big corporate or political guys who have truckloads of money. The fame, the fortune, the physical imprint in society: everything is there. But where do we stand? Have you ever wondered? Have you ever considered how now, as citizens of the 21^st century, we can make a name for ourselves with the click of a button? We have it easy. A couple taps on a keyboard, an idea here and there—and boom: something substantial that we have contributed to the world. We’re all in this together now. It is no longer, ‘one for all and all for one.’ We live in a world connected by theory, by fantasy. A web of ‘cyber circumstances.’ A “what if’ kind of lifestyle. We hold the key to our own destinies, and to each other’s. We now have the opportunity to make something of ourselves within the comfort of our own homes. Sitting at the kitchen table, wearing a bathrobe and drinking a cold cup of coffee. No warrior outfits, no business suits. Everything is theoretical, and because of this, we are able to take risks in ways we never have been able to before. So we sit. We linger, we hover. And we click. That is the new contribution.”

I’ve been in Arizona for over a month.. and it already feels like I’ve lived here for most of my life.

I love my roommate. I can’t even describe.. She’s my soulmate. We complete each other’s sentences, have the same taste in everything, laugh at the stupidest things, and so much more. 

I’ve met so many incredible people in the short amount of time that I’ve been here. There’s Hana, my other twin, who lives two doors down. She’s the most ghetto blonde haired caucasian girl from Wisconsin that I have ever met. Then there’s Marci, Isabelle, Kailin, Anjelle, Leiana, Vanessa, Lexi, Reese.. so many amazing girls! Luke, our big brother, lives 2 doors down from me. He’s the one who watches over all of us girls when we’re belligerently roaming the houses on Frat Row. ;) Joey, Kevin, Brian, Mike, Sammy Adams.. the boys on our floor are just as crazy as the girls. Oh yes, and of course there’s the lumberjack.. or who I like to consider my own personal Frank Sinatra. Nick’s a complicated creature, but I guess that’s why I stick around.

Things that I would love to be able to calculate after one month of college are: the amount of unnecessary meetings we’ve had to attend, the amount of $$ I’ve spent on junk food (chocolate, ice cream, Harvest Cheddar Sunchips, Spongebob Mac n’ Cheese), rides I’ve taken on the Lightrail train, naps I’ve taken, stupid homework assignments I’ve completed, how many times I’ve walked around the dorm in my pj’s and slippers, nights I’ve gone to bed past 3am, rolls of toilet paper we’ve gone through, the number of peanut butter cookies I’ve consumed in the dining hall, and lastly, how many handles of vodka Kaitlyn, Marci, Hana and I have consumed on our own. <3

I love college. No classes on Fridays. Monday classes don’t start until 2pm. Thirsty Thursdays. Drunken rides home from Tempe on the Lightrail. Frat parties, dorm parties, house parties, foam parties!! I’m involved in a ton of extracurriculars related to journalism already: I am one of 2 freshman who got hired on the spot to be senior reporters for State Press Television. I love State Press. I’ve met so many amazing people through the program. There’s Jordan and Cossandra, my two news directors who I love more than words can describe. They’re one of very few people who willingly stay with me in the editing bays on the 6th floor of the Cronkite building past 2am night after night. Blake, the crazy 18ft tall Matthew Mcconaughey. Arielle, the sweetest most talented girl I’ve ever met! She is so committed to SPTV, and is amazing at what she does. 

I could go on forever describing the amazing experiences I’ve had in college so far, but I actually have an essay to write. And then I have to go get drunk…

Oh yeah one more thing. Two words: Four. Lokos. 

“Here’s to the nights we wont remember with the friends we’ll never forget.” <3

I LOVE COLLEGE!

..how lonely I feel. I miss you more than anything.

You’re 10 floors below me, but I feel like we’re on different planets now.

I want things to go back to the way they were.

Going to cry myself to sleep tonight. 

But all I’ve got is this:

Damn, I’m going to miss Southern California.

This time next week I will have finished my first day of college. Well, I guess it’s time to get the show on the road.